Smooth Transitions from College to Home
What was your experience living at home after high school or college? Today’s blog post is a guest post from my youngest daughter, Jill Donaldson. Having just graduated from college and returning home for her last summer before grad school, I asked Jill to give tips for parents and students for coming home from college and transitioning back to family life for the summer or winter break. The biggest way to create a smooth transition from college to home for the whole family is through clear communication of expectations. As a parent, what way do you expect your child to help around the house or what meals do you expect them to participate in? As a student, what freedoms do you expect to have? Having those conversations will greatly improve the transition especially if the student has work or school obligations on top of family expectations. Parents: One of the things that parents can do to adapt to their child’s level of college independence is to set clear expectations of their time. It is reasonable to ask your child to let you know what days they will be home for dinner or an estimate of what time they will be…
Learn to say YES
Do people automatically expect you to say NO faster than you say YES? Learning to say “YES” easily was a piece of wisdom I came across as a young wife and parent. The wisdom behind this was that when you did need to say “NO”, it would be taken well knowing that it was not your usual answer just to avoid extra work or expenses. If possible, say YES to your kids asking to have a friend over, your students occasionally asking for more time on an assignment, your coworker asking you to lunch, or to your spouse asking to play soccer one night a week. Then when there’s a good reason to say NO it will be less of a shock or disappointment because you are known for saying YES to reasonable requests. Because our usual reason for saying NO to things with our children was typically due to scheduling conflicts, our children learned to check the family calendar before asking. This led to less conflicts and whining in the middle school years because it was not us saying NO because we were annoyed but because it was a schedule conflict. It also helped our children learn to negotiate…
