A Roadmap for the Launching Years
What was your roadmap for your teenage years? I bet every parent wishes there was a roadmap to give their teens in the launching years. God’s Word is a map for us. As a graduation gift for my oldest daughter and her friends, I made the MAP art piece and printed them on magnets as a visual reminder that God did not leave us without an instruction book for life. The verse on the art is Psalm 119:9-10. This is an excellent roadmap for teens in the launching years. How can a young person live a clean life? By carefully reading the map of your Word. I’m single-minded in pursuit of you; don’t let me miss the road signs you’ve posted. Psalm 119:9-10 The Message Recently I gave a tribute and read some of Psalm 119 at my father-in-law’s funeral. Before I married into the family, I had dad for a couple of my education and geography classes at Liberty University. Dad taught through Psalm 119 one year in the daily devotions he did at the beginning of his classes. With 176 verses, there was plenty to talk about! As his student I appreciate the consistency of this. He was…
Teach Kids to Advocate for Themselves
What are some reasons you should teach your child to advocate for themselves? No matter your parenting style, teach your kids to advocate for themselves. It will nurture their independence and give them ownership of their problems. In the younger years, you can give children language for asking. Teach them to politely ask for something they need or want and encourage them to tell why they need it. In the middle years, role play difficult situations and how to self advocate. This gives kids empowering strategies and the language to express themselves. With my tutoring clients, we often talk through how and when to ask a teacher for help or a parent for project supplies. This is a good age to allow real world experiences like ordering in a restaurant or paying for something at the store. Provide support for critical thinking and problem solving. Successful self advocacy boosts self esteem, especially during the launching years. I remember my daughters disliked having to go into restaurants for a take out menu or call the doctor’s office to schedule an appointment, but they felt pretty proud of themselves once they had done it. It would have been easy for me to…
Product Review: CLEP Exams
What are some ways you can save money on college? Testing out of required college courses is one way to save money on college and earn credit toward a college degree. AP (Advanced Placement) exams are sometimes offered to high school students upon completion of an advanced level high school course and award college credits for passing. However, CLEP exams (College Level Examination Program) are available to just about everyone anytime with 34 tests in 5 subject areas. These 1- 2 hour computer based multiple choice exams cost $89 per test and can award 3-6 college credits. There are even testing sites in countries other than the US. Anyone who excels at a particular topic and is planning to go to college should consider taking a CLEP exam as many colleges and universities accept passing scores as college credit. College Board, creator of the SAT test, offers AP and CLEP exams and a wide variety of test and college prep materials. By taking AP and/or CLEP exams, students may be able to save significant time and money on college or free up their schedule to take other courses. With some careful planning and research, some students have even shaved a…
10 Life Skills for the Launching Years
What life skill did you fail to learn before moving away from home? The launching years are a perfect time to teach your teens the life skills they need to cope with the challenges in the world around them so that they can feel confident and prepared. So many of these skills can be learned alongside parents and adults as they go about their everyday life. Do not wait until your kids are grown to start this! We started earlier than most, but the rewards have been great. Here’s 10 basic life skill categories you use to think about what your teens already know and what you can teach them during the launching years. 1. Meal Prep Teach your kids what makes a nutritious balanced meal and how to cook 5 or 6 simple ones. Show them cooking basics. As their confidence grows, expand their recipes and teach them meal planning and grocery shopping. Assign them a night to cook each week. Teach them to grill and how to brew good coffee. 2. Home Management Teaching cleaning chores and laundry should not wait until the launching years! Now teach kids how to use household appliances, unclog a drain, sew on…
Chore Charts
What was your least favorite chore as a child? Who does that chore at your house now? Chores are a fact of daily life. “Mom, it was so smart of you to try to get us to do one chore a day and not leave them all for Saturday! I’m so sorry I didn’t listen! Now I understand!” That’s what my married daughter said to me after my wise words and chore charts finally sunk in after all those years. The chore chart first appeared when my girls were in preschool. The weekly chores in the younger years involved bringing me the little trash cans on trash day and helping to dust or deliver piles of clean laundry to the bedroom. I remember once buying a new feather duster and toilet brush and bringing them home like prizes! Being young, my girls were excited about the new tools! The weekly chores grew into a daily chart that listed each person’s name and a chore that could be done in less than 5 minutes that day. (Saving them until Saturday was NOT an option then!) Dad and Mom chores were sometimes listed so everyone could see the shared workload. As the…
Setting up School Year Expectations
How does setting a homework schedule build life skills that impact the workplace? Just as a classroom teacher sets expectations, parents can also use the start of a new school year to set expectations for homework and chores. As children grow, so should their responsibilities as these life skills may impact their future workplace performance. During the younger years, they can be expected to put their backpack in the designated location and put any “parent homework” in a certain spot everyday. Homeschoolers can be expected to return their daily supplies to a designated location. As they get to the middle years, these school year expectations can grow. To avoid the morning rush or get a few more minutes of sleep, bookbags can be packed the night before, lunches can be made, and clothes laid out. All of this can be done by the children, with some initial supervision by the parents or caretakers. By the launching years, these school year expectations should be firm and there should be little need for reminders or follow ups. The start of a new school year is a great opportunity to revisit the expectations. “Each night after you clean up the dinner dishes, I’d…
Ministry Review: Moms In Prayer International
Is praying for an hour straight hard or easy for you? “Moms in Prayer International impacts children and schools worldwide for Christ by gathering mothers to pray.” This tagline says it all and it’s probably one of the best parenting decisions I ever made. For many years I joined like minded moms in praying for our children, their schools, and their teachers. What started as two moms praying together in 1984 has now grown to groups in over 150 countries with the vision that eventually every school in the world would be covered by a group of praying moms. The premise is to pray for your kids and their schools for an hour each week. I really liked the format they provide weekly, which is an outline for your prayer time and starts with highlighting an attribute of God. Since the groups are organized by schools, it’s not likely that everyone is from the same church which I found to be a strength. The best part of my week was the hour spent with sisters in Christ, passionate about our kids, schools and teachers. When I went back to work as a teacher, I also really appreciated knowing that there…
The Middle Years: The Promises
What’s the Meaning of a Promise Ring? There’s a certain anticipation of coming of age no matter how your family or culture celebrates it. I wanted to do something special for my girls but not a purity ring or a big party. I wanted to let my girls know that I promised to love them, encourage them, and be in their business until they got married or moved out of my house. With a little research and an amazing jeweler in Ireland, I got each of my girls a Claddagh ring that matched the one I wore. It’s said to mean “let love and friendship reign.” That’s what I wanted for their growing up years – love and friendship between parents and kids. We took them individually out to a fancy dinner around the age of 14 and presented the ring and a letter with our promise to be by their side. Memories were made. Their dad treated them like they could expect to be treated on a date, with respect and attention. Both girls have had the opportunity to tell that story when people have asked if their ring is a purity ring or a promise ring. I’m including…
The Middle Years: Calming the Chaos
Have you ever wanted to get off the middle school roller coaster of life, either as a parent or a child? Parenting isn’t for the faint of heart! The middle years are a roller coaster of emotions for both the kids and the parents. Recently a friend asked for parenting advice for these volatile days with her tween. I’ll share advice in a 3 part series, but you can get started today with these nine tips for calming the chaos in the middle years. If you are new here, I describe the stages of childhood as the younger years, the middle years, and the launching years. I also try to keep each blog post as a short read and vary my topics often. This month will be focused on the middle years. Tips for calming the chaos in the middle years: Teach your kids the “why” behind the rules. How does this rule protect them? Allow your kids to discuss/ask for exceptions but teach them to respect your final authority. Point them to one or two acceptable people they can talk to if they feel they cannot talk to you (close family friend, youth leader, mentor, relative, etc.). You’d rather…
Book Review: Blazing New Homeschool Trails
Are you more of a trailblazer or a trail follower when it comes to raising and educating kids? No matter how you answer this question, this BRAND NEW book, Blazing New Homeschool Trails: Educating and Launching Teens with Developmental Disabilities, could be for you! My friend, Natalie Vecchione, did not set out to be a trailblazer. She set out to be a wife and mama and along the way, realized that the path was no longer clear for her as a mama of a child with FASD (Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder is a brain based disorder). She unexpectedly became a trailblazer and is now leading others down the path though FASD Hope. I had the privilege of tutoring Natalie’s son, so I got to walk a little bit along their path. So many hindrances to their path could have broken their family, instead, it made them stronger. When Natalie said she was co authoring a book, I couldn’t wait to read it. In fact, I happily volunteered to be on the launch team so I could read it early! I also looked forward to reading the story of Cindy LaJoy and the business, Buckaroos Slices and Scoops, that her kids…
